Lay It All Out on the Table

Just because you think something is right, doesn't mean that others think so too.

We all have our own beliefs based on our respective backgrounds, and since we're all coming from different perspectives, forcing your expectations on others is unreasonable.

For example... 

Your friend comes to stay with you for a few months while they try to get back on their feet. You might expect them to tell you everything going on in their lives, after all, they are your friend and they are living in your space! Unless you make this assumption clear to them: They. Owe. You. Nothing. No matter the circumstances, they are not obligated to share any information with you so long as your living arrangement is upheld.

If someone needs your help, that doesn't mean they have to bend to your will, unless you tell them so and they agree to it. 

Back to the example

If your friend is staying in your house, and you know you run things in a particular way, lay down the law before they show up at your door, or don't say anything at all! It's your job to establish ground rules when you let others come in close contact with you, for their sake and yours.

"Expect nothing, receive all."

No one owes you anything in life. Your expectations for someone will not always be what they have for themselves, and that's okay because it's their life, not yours. A lot of problems come from the fact that everyone has differing opinions but never bring them up until they have an issue. In order to avoid this, say what you mean and mean what you say! Once you put your expectations out there, the situation is out of your hands and it's up to them to either rise to the occasion...or not. Either way, you won't be particularly invested, or as hurt.

About the Co-author

Angel Yates is a junior criminal justice major at Hampton University from Washington, DC. Follow her on IG here.  

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